BDSM is a term which describes a number of related patterns of human sexual behaviour. The major subgroupings are described in the abbreviation "BDSM" itself:
Many of the specific practices in BDSM are those which, if performed in neutral or nonsexual contexts, are widely considered unpleasant, undesirable, or disadvantageous. For example, pain, physical restraint and servitude are traditionally inflicted on persons against their will and to their detriment. In BDSM, however, these activities are engaged in with the mutual consent of the participants, and typically for mutual enjoyment.This emphasis on informed consent and safety is also known as SSC (safe, sane and consensual), though others prefer RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink), which places the emphasis more on informed consent, and acknowledges the fact that all activities are potentially risky.
On a psychological level, much BDSM play involves power and dominance, in particular power exchange of various forms. One person may willingly and consciously hand over personal autonomy or the power dynamic may arise between the parties in the relationship as a spontaneous result of their interpersonal chemistry, in which case no conscious decision is made. This power can manifest in an endless variety of relationship dynamics. Some of the variations include:
According to most practitioners, the power exchange should always be negotiated. Before play, the participants discuss their physical and psychological limitations, establish safewords (words that will signal the cessation of the scene), and work out what activities they will engage in.Just as important as safety during the scene, aftercare should always be provided. Aftercare emphasizes neutral holding or cuddling, and facilitated discussion in order to ensure that both parties are alright with what just occurred. Aftercare can also include first aid and cleaning up if necessary.However, many reject extensive negotiation and eschew the use of safewords, preferring instead to accept heightened risk and facilitate a more "natural" interaction. The conflict between the need for risk and the need for limitations and safety is at the heart of the SSC and RACK controversies.
BDSM may encompass practices such as erotic spanking, flagellation, such as flogging, paddling or whipping, or medical submission (i.e. a submissive partner submits to humiliating and/or painful medical procedures).BDSM activities are practiced by male and female individuals of all sexualities: gay or straight, or bisexual, as well as the transgendered. Many practice their BDSM activities exclusively in private, and do not share their predilections with others. Others socialize with other BDSM practitioners. The BDSM community can be regarded as a subculture within mainstream society. Being involved in BDSM or dominant/submissive relationships on a regular basis is often referred to as being "in the lifestyle".Some sources estimate the prevalence of BDSM behavior in countries such as the United States at around 5 to 10% of the adult population. While the stereotype of heterosexual BDSM is a male dominant and female submissive, the reality is almost evenly split between "maledom" and "femdom" couples.
On a physical level, BDSM "sensation play" often involves inflicting pain, even if without actual injury. This releases endorphins, creating a sensation somewhat like runner's high or the afterglow of orgasm, sometimes called "flying", which some find enjoyable. Some writers use the term "body stress". This experience is the motivation for many in the BDSM community but is not the only motivating factor. Indeed, a strong minority of BDSM participants (especially "bottoms") may well participate in a scene they do not derive any physical pleasure from in order to provide their "top" with an opportunity to indulge their desires or fetishes.In some kinds of BDSM play, the "top" (usually a dominant partner) applies sensation to the "bottom" (usually a submissive partner) by spanking, slapping, pinching, stroking or scratching with fingernails, or using implements like straps, whips, paddles, canes, knives, hot wax, ice, clothespins, bamboo skewers, etc. The sensation of being bound with rope, chains, straps, cling wrap, handcuffs or other materials can also be part of the experience. The tools of BDSM play encompass a wide variety of items from specifically designed implements to ordinary household items, known as "pervertibles".A pleasurable BDSM experience is thought to depend greatly upon a competent top and the bottom attaining the correct state of mind. Trust and sexual arousal help a person prepare for the intense sensation. Some have even gone so far as to compare adept BDSM play to musical composition and performance, each sensation like a musical note. Likewise, BDSM different sensations are combined in different ways to produce the total experience.